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Independent Adoption Independent Adoptions are collaborative efforts, in which a person locates a birthparent and either uses the agency to help facilitate the adoption or adopts as a Step-Parent. The birthmother is initially located by the attorney or the PAP. Frequently the PAP must make efforts to develop an effective and positive relationship with the prospective birthmother. Independent adoptions may provide more autonomy for the Applicant(s) because DCFS social workers do not visit regularly during the pre-adoptive phase. The lack of DCFS intervention, and the necessity of a cultivated relationship with the birthparent, means a good attorney must assist the full process, as well as ensure that laws are followed. Whether the birthparent is located by the attorney, who selects the adoptive parents; or whether a private adoption agency matches a pregnant mother, a newborn, or a child with a PAP; or whether the PAP provides a prospective birthmother -- she is entitled to reimbursement of routine birth-related fees (including medical care, counseling, and legal advice) and reasonable living expenses. She may not ask for additional compensation for extraordinary expenses. The attorneys charge fees for screening birthmothers, matching Applicants, and legal advice. The attorney works to protect the rights of the prospective adoptive parent(s) and minimize adoption failures. The average total cost for an independent adoption ranges from $12,000 to $15,000 for all costs. Independent Adoption limits participation by governmental agencies to drafting and approving a "homestudy" and one post-placement home-visit by a social worker. Therefore, the administrative fees are more manageable. The birthmother has a 90-day period during which she may revoke her consent to adoption, so a risk exists that a well-bonded Applicant may have a failed adoption. The birthmother can permanently waive her right to revoke, and she can permanently relinquish custody, but this can only be done after childbirth. A contract is not legal if it is made to give away something you do not yet have... in this case, an unborn child. Similarly, after birth the PAP may withdraw an application for any reason. Hiring a Surrogate Mother Surrogacy is a very complicated, high-risk method of securing a family. The adopting parent(s) engage a woman to carry a child born of either the adopting parent's sperm and the Surrogate's egg (traditional) or of a combination of the adopting parent's egg and/or sperm and that of a donor (gestational). It is also possible to implant a fertilized egg into a Surrogate's womb. Surrogacy involves unusual risk because the law may permit her to change her mind and withdraw her agreement to give up parental rights. This circumstance also leaves open the possibility that the donating adoptive parent may be charged for child support. However, because of the nature of the surrogacy contract, an agreement is signed before birth permitting the intended parents to receive the child at the hospital. Surrogacy is quite expensive because California law permits not only reimbursement of normal prenatal and birth expenses, but also payment of additional living expenses to the Surrogate. This reimbursement can far exceed that permitted by state law to other birthmothers. Administrative and legal fees charged to the adoption depend on whether the father must establish his paternity by petition, or whether the wife must file a step-parent adoption petition. International Adoption International Adoptions can be handled like private agency adoptions, but the child or birthmother usually resides in the foreign country. Although these adoptions can give rise to occasionally frighteningly complex proceedings, an experienced attorney will assist in "navigating deep waters." Only specific countries permit adoption by U.S. applicants, and then only under specific circumstances. The Hague Convention will standardize legal proceedings and ethical procedures for international adoptions and is slowly being ratified by the world's nations. Again, both foreign agencies and other countries can and sometimes do exercise control over approval of Applicants based on personal characteristics or lifestyle orientation. However, many, many foreign-born children are adopted by members of every American community every day and the adoptions can proceed quite smoothly. Occasionally, Applicants may specify desired personal characteristics for an adopted child. Opportunities arise for American PAPs annually, as countries open (and close) doors for international adoption. An adoption homestudy is necessary from a private U.S. agency beforehand, but there is no DCFS involvement because the providing country has validated the adoption. International adoption wait-times vary. It is virtually impossible to insure against receiving a child with history of abuse or late-developing defect/disability. Moreover, Third World nations may provide significantly less pre-natal or post-natal care for the pregnant mother. Also, the expense of a foreign adoption can be frighteningly high, from $20,000 to $50,000 per child. Some countries may require that the adopting parents travel to the country and reside there for an extended bonding period, and this requirement may hamper all but Applicants with significant resources, plenty of vacation time, and the willingness to reside in countries with significantly lower standards of living. These horror stories abound, but the usual course is well worth the cost. These adoptive parents never need worry about birthparents requesting visits nor reclaiming the children, as they are "freed" in advance. I'm Gay. Can I Adopt, Too? I am frequently asked if Gays and Lesbians are permitted to adopt in California, and the answer is an unqualified, "yes." The media watches and publicly marks these social milestones, as healthy "alternative families" form and thrive. Gay and Lesbian individuals and couples are welcomed to apply to adopt "in the best interests of the child." Fulfilling Your Dreams Each prospective adoptive parent has a different set of desires and needs, and each adoptive child's case varies in specific details and problems. Working with your Attorney will help you set priorities and assist in determining the best course of action considering those priorities. Have a great time fulfilling your dreams! |
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